Do you see this little boy???
Every time I come across his picture, I see my Cole, when he was little. I know all about the "special needs" this child will have due to FAS. As I look at him, I can't help but wonder what he will be like in say, 13 yrs.
No.
Let me re-phrase that.
I KNOW what he will be like in 13 yrs UNLESS someone rescues him from the life he now knows.
When we went to bring Gabe home and spent time at the institution that he had been transferred to, I saw what this little guy will be in 13 yrs.
FAS has a lifetime sentence of its own, but being institutionalized for the rest of your life, because of this, and or for other reasons, is not only a lifetime sentence........its often a DEATH SENTENCE.
I saw what MY COLE MAN would have been, had God not put the opportunity before me to go get him, and he had stayed in an institution.
I wrapped my arms around boys who could of been my Cole.
I looked into eyes filled with tears, knowing, this could of been my Cole.
I listened with my own ears as Sergey proclaimed, "I'm a good boy.......a very good boy." Take me, they whispered, knowing very well, they could have ALL been my Cole and now, my Gabe.
My heart breaks just typing these words.
Is every day easy??
No.
Is every day worth it??
A million times, YES.
Cole struggles every day because of FAS and Autism. WE struggle every day with his special needs issues. Last night was one of the those that left us both in tears.
When I finally went to bed, the Lord and I spent some time together as I poured my heart out to Him, and this is what I woke up to this morning:
NOT IN VAIN
- 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NIV)
As I opened my devotional up to read, this was it! And the prayer focus was for "weary caregivers."
YOU DID IT AGAIN LORD!
YOU. WOWED. ME. AGAIN.
Thankful to serve an awesome, inspiring, loving, gracious God, who keeps my feet planted firmly in Him and lets me know, that all things work together for good, and our labors of love, when done in HIS NAME, will never be in vain.
Being mom to a child with special needs is not a piece of cake.
It's a piece of heaven :)
And sometimes when I forget.......my Lord is right on top of things and always shows me just what I need to PRESS ON and continue this journey.