"I prayed for this child and the LORD has granted me what I asked of Him" 1Samuel 1:27

Saturday, January 29, 2011


GRATEFUL are the receivers.
For most 15 yr. old boys, this would be "just a card."  But for Cole Lawrence, this was MUCH more than "just a card."  This was, "look at ALL my friends", this was "Kim, they love me??!", this was........ simply.......... the best!! He has read and re-read every word. He has hardly put it down. For this boy AND this boy's mom.........THIS was certainly much more than "just a card."   Thank you for making him feel special.

Thursday, January 27, 2011


We were told that he knows his "mama and papa" are coming for him..........now that just makes me cry!
He has no idea what awaits him. He has no idea how many tears have already been shed for him and how many more will fall before he gets here. But more than that.....he has no idea of the blood that was shed for him.....not by me.....but by the One that is sending me, to bring him home.  Oh, but he will know....one day, he will know.  In the words of Cole Lawrence......PRAISE THE LORD  PRAISE THE LORD  PRAISE THE LORD   HALLELUJAH   THANK YOU JESUS!!!!!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


Tonight while most of us sleep, a very important meeting will be taking place in Russia concerning the lives of 3 little ones. One woman....one Judge....will say whether these little ones will remain alone, unloved and hidden from the rest of the world for the rest of their lives OR whether they will be able to go with their new mommas and daddies to homes filled with love and acceptance, brothers and sisters, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends. Never, ever, to be all alone again.
These families will be at the mercy of their facilitator who will be speaking the words needed to convince the judge that the adoption is in the best interest of these children. You see, in the world in which they live, they are damaged goods. And even in our country, they probably would have been aborted. But to these families, they are priceless treasures. They are wanted and loved. And to God, they are His chosen little ones.
So, if you happen to wake up during tonight, or maybe you are willing to set your alarm for @2:00 A.M. and purposely get up and get on your knees and pray for these kiddos and their families. There has never been a child with DS adopted out of this region. If the judge approves these adoptions, it could open the door for many more who wait. When one of the families were at this orphanage for their first visit, they were told that they were the first visitors to the orphanage in SEVEN YEARS.  Ninety-eight children labeled as "damaged" by their society, and put away as far out of sight and mind as possible.
If one of these were your child, what would you do?????

One of them IS mine. Not in this orphanage, but in the region right next to this one. And yes, i'm scared for my little one. I'm afraid that this one judge's decision might affect the outcome of our own adoption. Please pray for these 3 children and their families. Pray for eyes to be opened and hearts to be changed. Pray for all these little ones that spend day after day with no one to hold them and love them and tell them they are perfect just the way they are......just the way God made them.  PLEASE PRAY.


Baby J


Friday, January 21, 2011


This morning when i sat down to read my devotional, the person writing it was talking about the Mesto Vstrechi. This is the Russian edition of the "Upper Room".  The title means,"Meeting Place."  Now......how fitting is that!!  God willing, we will be in that country in a few months to meet our little one.
As soon as i get the "ok", i will be able to share more with you about this little guy. He is precious, and we are so thankful for this opportunity.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011


Well, in case you haven't heard yet......YES WE ARE ADOPTING ANOTHER LITTLE BOY!!!.  This will be my 3rd adoption, the first being a domestic one and now 2 international.  The little one will join our seven others and they will be our GREAT EIGHT!!!   Now for those of you that may be reading and don't know us.....there will be only 3 of them at home(the others are already out on their own....well, for the most part!) . Our new litttle guy is coming from Russia(can't be more specific just yet in order to protect his idenity). But i can tell you he is 4 1/2, he has down syndrome and strong facial features of fetal alcohol syndrome, he has blonde hair and he is precious. (his caregivers say he is happy most of the time and likes to sing and dance!) Other than that.....i don't know much about him yet.  We have done lots of paperwork the last few days and had our homestudy visit last night.(Now, talk about sitting on pins and needles when she visited with cole lawrence by himself!!!!!lol) He is excited and can hardly wait to teach him MUST BE SANTA!!! I told him that Gabe would be his #1 student!   I know you are wondering WHY and HOW this all came about...again. I will share that in a few days and i hope you will keep coming to this blog to follow us on this journey.  Its going to be a long, rough ole ride, but I know the One riding next to me and we will be just fine.  Wow.....THE JOURNEY HAS BEGUN.

Monday, January 17, 2011

but Lord......

but Lord.......I'm alittle afraid

"I will give you strength"
Isaiah 41:10-13

but Lord.......am i strong enough....i'm kinda "old"

"I will give you strength"
1 Corinthians 16: 13

but Lord........its going to be so hard

"I will give you strength"
Phillipians 4:16

but Lord.......what will my family and friends think

"I will give you strength"
1 Peter 3:14

i'm sitting here right now with a smile on my face and thankfulness in my heart because............well........because the Lord IS my strength and even when i don't know......He does......and I will TRUST HIM and follow where ever He leads me...........even if i'm alittle afraid, even if i'm too old, even if i know the road will be very bumpy, and even if the ones i love most, might not understand.........

"trust Him"
Proverbs 3:5,6

Saturday, January 15, 2011



Monday, January 10, 2011


So much going on in me these days. so much i want to say, well ok, maybe yell. but the bottom line is this......unless you've been down this road i'm on, theres no way i can make you understand why i feel like i feel about these kids. especially these that may never be much more than "someone to take care of".  i came across Derek Loux's letter again the other night while searching for some answers to some of my questions and others questions that have been asked of me. i think now is the time to share this fathers heart with whoever may be reading this. This is powerful stuff, and for those of you who don't know this man, he is in heaven now. He was killed in a auto accident afew days before Christmas last year. He left his wife, and 10 precious kiddos to go on without him. He and his wife truly were living out James1:27and his wife continues to do this to this day.  This is the letter he wrote while in Ukraine adopting 3 of his boys.

Redemption by Derek Loux - Friday, December 12, 2008

"Renee’ and I are sitting in the office of a telephone company in Novograd Valenski, Ukraine, using wireless internet. We are in the middle of adopting three special needs boys from an orphanage here. Two of the boys have Down Syndrome. Roman is high functioning, energetic and happy. Dimitri has serious mental retardation, failure to thrive, and though he is five years old, he is the size of a 1 year old. He has sores on his face, a distinct smell of death on him, and yells out if we try to do anything with him other than hold him. Because he has less ability to respond and learn, he naturally gets less attention and care from the orphanage workers in this world of limited resources. The harsh reality of the “survival of the fittest” principle is a life and death struggle that this little boy is losing fast. Our third boy Sasha, is a brilliant six year old who has Spina Bifida (the condition our son Josiah died from in 1996). He is like a learning sponge that can’t get enough! He is happy and alert and thirsty for knowledge and experience. So with two of our boys, we get an immediate return on any investment we make. With Dimitri, there’s not much immediate gratification. In fact, it’s unknown when and if there will be a return at all. This is the kind of situation that makes the carnal, fallen, human reasoning think, “Why try? What’s the point? What will this produce? What good will this do? Why not select a boy who has more potential? This looks like a lost cause.

Two days ago we drove for hours into the Ukrainian countryside to the village where Dimitri was born. We met with officials there and signed papers and answered their questions. We also went and saw Dimitri’s house. The day had been long, we were still recovering from jet lag, I was beginning to really miss my six daughters at home and all the familiar things our fragile human hearts entangle themselves with in feeble attempts to feel secure. Sitting in the dark on our very long drive back to Novograd that night, the Holy Spirit began to whisper to my heart, and new understanding about redemption began to take shape.

I was thinking, “Man, adopting this little boy has been so much work. This is exhausting, expensive, uncomfortable … and it doesn’t feel very rewarding right now.” What am I doing in some little Soviet car in the dark, in the middle of rural Ukraine in frozen December, as the driver dodges cats and potholes? What if Dimitri doesn’t improve at all? What if we get “nothing” out of this? … Ahhh, there it was; that dark, fallen, unreedemed, selfish human love, rooted in the tree of the knowledge of “good and evil”. The love the Greeks called “erao” love. The love where we treat someone as precious and treasured for what we can get out of it. This is unlike “agapeo” love, the God kind of love that treats someone as treasured and precious for their good, not for my good. It’s when I love a person in order to meet their needs, having no expectation of them meeting any of my needs. At a whole new level, God is working His kind of love into my weak heart, and He’s using little Dimitri to do it.

On the drive home that night, the Lord whispered in my ear, “This is Redemption. Derek, do you know how far I traveled to get you and bring you back? I had to be separated from my Son, in order to get you, just like you are separated from your children in order to get these boys. Do you know how expensive it was for Me to purchase you? It cost me everything. Do you know how broken, sick, damaged, twisted, dirty, smelly, and hopeless you were? And at the end of it all, you had nothing to give me or add to me. I did it for you. I emptied myself and became nothing so that you could have it all. This is redemption.

My friends, adoption is redemption. It’s costly, exhausting, expensive, and outrageous. Buying back lives costs so much. When God set out to redeem us, it killed Him. And when He redeems us, we can’t even really appreciate or comprehend it, just like Dimitri will never comprehend or fully appreciate what is about to happen to him … but … he will live in the fruit of it. As his Daddy, I will never expect him to understand all of this or even to thank me. I just want to watch him live in the benefits of my love and experience the joys of being an heir in my family. This is how our heavenly “Papa” feels towards us.

Today, settle your busy heart down and rest in the benefits of redemption. Enjoy the fruits of His goodness, and stop trying to “pay Him back”. You’ll never get close you goofy little kid."

If you or someone you know is considering adoption and you (or they) need just a little "nudge" of the heart to say, "lets do it, i'm all in," then i pray this post of Derek's "Redemption", will do it for you. Believe me when i say, adoption will challenge you and it will CHANGE you for the better. 

Thursday, January 6, 2011

What a difference a family can make

The first time i layed eyes on cole, my heart just sank. i literally got weak and had to sit down. he was 10 months old but much more like about a 3 month old. his head still bobbed around and he had no muscle tone at all. he had layed in his bed most of his life and for the first 4 months of his life, he was very sick and very weak.  but the thing i remember most, was the emptiness in his eyes. i thank God that he only had to endure that life for 10 months. as soon as my mom and i walked out of that orphanage with him, we were family, and we gently drenched him in love, and bless his heart......he soaked it up. within days, i swear, you could see it all over him......the difference of having a family.......and not having a family.....the difference of feeling loved.......and not feeling loved. 

The little boys below have been home now for 6 months. little theo would probably not made it through another winter. and of no fault of the orphanage caretakers. they did what they could for him but had such little resources to rely on. and zhen, he was physically much stronger than theo but yet so fragile emotionally. Thank God, their forever family found them and was able to get them out fairly quickly. Take a look at the them when their mom and dad got to them and now 6 months later since they have been home.





I don't know what family means to you......but i know what family means to them..........LIFE.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011


From a humble prayer and a CLEAR sky.........God sent the rain.......and Cole said, "the Lord hear us Kim!"
I remember that day so well. My precious and oldest daughter had just left us to go to England to finish her masters degree and cole and i were very sad that she was leaving us and that there would be an ocean separating us. I was sitting in the office in tears after she left and cole came in to see about me and said, "lets pray to the Lord that gig (thats her nickname) be safe." And so we did and then he went out to play. I got on the computer and was reading something when he came up behind me and said, "mom!".  I didn't turn around because I WAS BUSY reading something. Finally he said, "KIM, look at me!" When i turned to do just that, i saw that he was drenched!! Sopping wet!  I said, "WHAT did you do???!! He said, "the Lord hear us Kim! He sent the rain to say us!"  He meant HE, the LORD, sent the rain to TELL us that He heard our  prayer and gig would be ok. Now on most days when the sky is blue and alittle shower pops up, i call that a cotton shower and think nothin else about it. But on this day.....cole called it GOD. He chose to see God, to FEEL God, in the rain that fell on him. 
I wonder how many times i miss out on GOD'S TOUCH because i'm so caught up in the storms of my life. How many times i miss out on recognizing little reminders that the good Lord gives me each day to see and feel His grace.
Lord help me to be more aware of Your presence as i go about my days. 

Monday, January 3, 2011


I posted awhile back about a little boy who had stolen my heart and was so in hopes that he would find a family. Well, not only has a family stepped up to be his forever family, they have also committed to another little boy and so they will be bringing home not one but TWO! Gavin and now precious little Tristan will be coming home soon. Thank you Jesus. Bless the House family for saying "yes" and giving these little guys a life.


Saturday, January 1, 2011


As 2010 comes to an end and 2011 is just around the corner(in like 32 min.!) i have a challenge to throw out to anybody that reads this for the up coming year.  Just a few weeks back, the question of "interruption or opportunity" was presented to me. how do we look at things that come up in our lives??? do we see obstacles that we encounter as interruptions of our lives or do we see them as maybe opportunities to better ourselves or maybe help better someone elses situation??? i believe that we are given lots of opportunities to make a difference in lives, whether our own or somebody elses, and we pass those up for reasons that just don't matter in the long run.  For 2011, i hope and pray, that i don't pass up any opportunity that the good Lord shows me and mistake it as an interruption in my life.  If you have thought about adopting and somewhere in your mind, think it might be interrupting your lifestyle or your family in some way, stop thinking that! It will be the OPPORTUNITY of a lifetime.  may God bless you and your family in the year to come. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!